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Taralynn's Desk

PostPosted: Mon Dec 11, 2006 6:20 pm
by Taralynn
So I decided to brave the world that is the wide web and create a site. Big thanks goes out to Pip who drew for me and who is letting me use his bandwidth. Thanks also goes out to Duck who drew for me as well. Please check it out and let me know what you think either by posting or through email.

Taralynn's Desk

I plan to post a story every Tuesday so there always should be some new content at least in that regard if not some story art.

Hopin' I'll get bookmarked!
Taralynn Andrews

PostPosted: Tue Dec 12, 2006 1:08 am
by Arkain
Oh yeah, I remember your Mother Raven story, along with Pip's art.
I felt rather sorry for Lowrie. Punishment well beyond the crime and all, but then you can't argue with the cruel.

Also not found of permanent and complete personality changes, but hey, that's just me. ;D

In terms of style, can't complain.

PostPosted: Tue Dec 12, 2006 2:08 pm
by Taralynn
Yeah, with the Mother Raven I tried to go with the concept of a psuedo-trickster god but with more of a mean streak- very vindictive. Therefore the punishment most definately didn't match the crime.

PostPosted: Tue Dec 12, 2006 7:09 pm
by Arkain
Ah Raven, you never cease to amuse me.

PostPosted: Thu Dec 14, 2006 2:27 pm
by Chibi MitchellTF
Hm...I as well think that Lowrie's fate is a bit not my style, especially with the Drew angle. I find it interesting that it's not PERSONALITY changes, in that she's still the same person, she just has female hormones. (Possibly over-charged ones.)

I'd possibly add a sentence or two implying that the new Laura's rational mind decides to accept dating Drew, so as to avoid Mother Raven sentencing Laura to being functionally raped. (In a way.)

PostPosted: Thu Dec 14, 2006 4:41 pm
by Kyunji
Chibi MitchellTF wrote:I'd possibly add a sentence or two implying that the new Laura's rational mind decides to accept dating Drew, so as to avoid Mother Raven sentencing Laura to being functionally raped. (In a way.)


That's already there. Reread the last few paragraphs.

[quote="Mother Raven"]Leslie pondered those words. What did she mean by that? Continue through her? She didn’t mean-

Leslie’s introspection turned to the security she felt as Drew held her by her waist. The sweet abandon she felt as they kissed. The undeniable ecstasy that flowed through her as her flawless frame pressed against his strong body. The hundreds of beats her heart skipped as they gazed into the eyes of the other… She knew exactly what Mother Raven meant. A chill went down her spine.

“Caaaw!â€

PostPosted: Thu Dec 14, 2006 5:55 pm
by Chibi MitchellTF
That was her being driven by hormones/emotions, not her accepting the situation rationally, and simply saying, "Yes Mother" doesn't tell whether it's resigned, forced, or what.

PostPosted: Fri Dec 15, 2006 1:16 am
by Duck
Well, as I look over it (ravens are underused in tfin) but clearly, clearly Mother Raven isn't a normal Raven. I mean, obviously she's got a human form. And since she can make new young, adept in magic. So what could she be eh?

I'm thinking a lost Goddess, personally. Using a raven as kinda a representation. She must continue the line, through Leslie. So what do ya'll think huh?

PostPosted: Fri Dec 15, 2006 7:37 pm
by Arkain
I hope not, that's something of an overused cliche. The Gods and Goddesses we typically inject tend to be stripped of their mythological trappings.

PostPosted: Tue Dec 19, 2006 2:55 am
by Taralynn
And Taralynn's Desk has been updated once more with my next story. This time it's the first chapter from my sci-fi mystery called *drumroll please* Crew Shift!

We have some wonderful artwork by Duck in this story so please check it out and PLEASE tell me what you think either by email or by just chatting here. I'd really like to hear your theories on what's coming!

PostPosted: Tue Dec 19, 2006 7:11 pm
by Lucky
Crew Shift Seems prety awsome so far. Can't wait for the next Chapter.

PostPosted: Tue Dec 19, 2006 7:21 pm
by Chibi MitchellTF
Ditto.

PostPosted: Tue Dec 19, 2006 9:48 pm
by Taralynn
Any reason in particular you liked it?

PostPosted: Wed Dec 20, 2006 4:52 am
by Arkain
Something seems funny about it. I can't put my finger on it.

Almost too... wooden, maybe, even for a military story.
And some of the private monologues and statements feel a little cheesey.

PostPosted: Wed Dec 20, 2006 10:32 am
by Taralynn
Wooden concerns me. I don't want that... a little cheesey though- that's just fine ^^ There's supposed to be a level of cheese to this story since it's kind of a TG parody of Star Trek.