Shadowmaster's fic idea thread.

[Mystic Mina]

I wonder....

You remember when the Destiny Island was attacked by the heartless, right? And how Kairi's heart was put within Sora's body? What if Kairi's heart turned Sora female, or even turned him into Kairi herself?

[Shadowmaster]

You know, I forgot about that at the time I made my last post, but that was also an idea I had. So, adding that to the list, what do you all think is the better idea? Hmm, I could work with that idea alot...

[Shadowmaster]

I have decided. I shall go with the Sages idea. Because...it has more possibilities for akward moments...

Anyway, I may start this one soonish, if I can remember how the game started...

[Arkain]

Yes! Do Kingdom Hearts stuff!

[Shadowmaster]

I will/am going to.

[Shadowmaster]

Well, for all you KH fans, I have the first KH fic chapter up.
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/3155482/1/
I hate first chapters...

[Arkain]

Mrr......
We've been over this.

All you're doing is repeating the game with very tiny, insignificant, utterly nonconsequential changes. This isn't a fanfic so much as it is a narrative.

I know I sound harsh, but for the love of writing, please show some creativity and variety!

[Shadowmaster]

I plan on it...I just really hate first chapters. I really could not think of any way to make that particular chapter too different from the game. The upcoming chapters however will be better, at least I hope so.

[Arkain]

Marvelous.

I look forward to it.

[Shadowmaster]

Does anyone have any tips so that my vg based fics can come out better? I want them to be...well....better.

[Arkain]

Well, you've already gotten an earful from me (and I don't mean to sound mean!)

If need be, take the stories where they don't go in the game.
For example, do you really need to visit any of the worlds in Kingdom Hearts I? At best, it should only be peripherally related.

A strong emphasis on the character's change is needed.
Link/Sora are girls. Great, now what?
Since it's the central theme, you need at least some things that focus around that.

[Nikki]

well you could explore personality changes from hormones...possible romantic interests (like maybe Sora develops a huge crush on Riku)

[Kyunji]

Does anyone have any tips so that my vg based fics can come out better? I want them to be...well....better.

First and foremost, don't be afraid to deviate. Don't stop yourself from writing something because you're afraid it'll be too different from the original game or take the story away from the main game. If someone is even reading your work, then chances are that they know the plot anyways. Instead of just summarizing the plot and changing "he" to "she", take things further. Make new scenes (romance? Write it if you can). Make new problems ("This sword feels a lot heavier..."). Make new solutions ("FIRAGA!").

Another issue almost equally as important as deviation I find in your writing is a lack of detail. You tend to skip over such events as battles. I would suggest that instead of writing something like "Sora swung the Keyblade and destroyed the tiny creature," you write a passage such as "Sora lifted the keyblade and swung with all her might at the dark shape. The blade connected solidly, and Sora watched in amazement as the figure writhed and faded into light." Similarly, you tend to rush one of the primary focuses of your stories: the actual TG aspect. In many of your writings, you simply use one or two sentences to describe a character changing form. In "Legend of Zelda: Majora's Mask:A different kind of" (might want to fix that title), you use the following to describe Link transformings into a girl:

Link started to feel dizzy. He felt himself shrink several inches, his hand’s became smaller and more delicate, his hips expanded slightly, his ears grew longer, as did his hair. His chest pushed out slightly, while his waist pulled in, making an hourglass figure. Finally, his groin pulled in and he was left with an empty feeling down there.

Three sentences. That's all you ever use to discuss the major focus of your story. Three rushed, almost run-on sentences. Instead of just generalizing what happens, use precise details. Rather than putting "his hands became smaller and more delicate", put a sentence such as "Link watched, wide-eyed, as the skin on his hands seemed to contract. His fingers seemed to pull back into into his hand slightly, decreasing in length, and his entire hand shrunk. Before his very eyes, his fingernails lengthened, almost as though to make up for his smaller digits." It may be slightly more work, but in the end, it makes your story all the better.

I'm certain this sounds insanely complex and like a lot of hard work to you, but if you try to follow this advice, I feel that it will make your works of literature much better than they are now.

[Shadowmaster]

Thank you everyone who has posted so far, and I shall try my best to implement your suggestions into my stories. Also, as for the Zelda thing, the change not being addressed, it will be. Also, I will make the change a lot more influencing in the KH fic. *Cough*Riku*Cough*

>.>
<.<

[Shadowmaster]

Also, it worries me a bit that the most posts I've gotten in this thread in this amount of time has been a chance for people to tell me what is wrong with my stories.