[Writing] Queen Octavia's Lair

[Kyunji]

That is an excellent story! Check out my Stories. The one I update most Frequently is New Lives: Galactic Guardians. Here is the link to my stories: AshK's Fanfiction last Update: 03/24/2008

Good work! Keep up the story!

Okay I got your review. Have you read the New Lives Saga by Emma Iveli yet? You also need to read Galactic Guardians as well.

Here is the link to Emma's Fics. She is my Co-Author on New Lives: Galactic Guardians:

Emma Iveli's Fanfiction

Read New Lives, New Lives R, New Lives C, and Galactic Guardians before you jump into New Lives: Galactic Guardians.

Sincerely,
Dark Scout Cyclondia

This isn't my topic, so perhaps I'm out of place to say this, but it's quite rude to advertise your fanfiction in another member's dedicated story topic. I've seen you do this before -- you make a post consisting of a single, short, unhelpful compliment like "Good story!" and then proceed to blatantly advertise your own stories without any further regard to the other member's content. This is very impolite -- the equivalent of interrupting someone who's in the middle of telling a story to say "That's nice, but now listen to my story." This steals the original poster's thunder and quite frankly makes you look like an attention whore. If you want to advertise your fiction, make your own thread.

I'm sorry to further derail this thread, but I feel that this should be followed by all members and thus needs to be said publicly. DSC, if you want to discuss this more, please PM me.

[Queen Octavia]

Aww, Kyunji, I saw your name as the responding poster and was really looking forward to some scathing yet helpful comments. You dissapointed me (Seriously)

While it is true that DSC was attracting attention to her own story, as an author I can hardly blame her! What'd be the point of stories if no one read them? And DSC has done quite a bit of work.

I find it rather silly to complain about someone trying to draw attention to their contributions. A more appropriate course of action would be to thank them for their work!

I personally don't mind what people do in a thread I created, just because I made the first post in it doesn't mean I own it. The title and first post alert people to my existence and point them to my work, which is all I really wanted

So, in short, no harm no foul.


PS - I really would value some input from you Kyunji, and also, you should do some more writing, the (one? Ive been away for a while) story you did write was quite enjoyable.

[Kyunji]

While it is true that DSC was attracting attention to her own story, as an author I can hardly blame her! What'd be the point of stories if no one read them? And DSC has done quite a bit of work.

I find it rather silly to complain about someone trying to draw attention to their contributions. A more appropriate course of action would be to thank them for their work!

I personally don't mind what people do in a thread I created, just because I made the first post in it doesn't mean I own it. The title and first post alert people to my existence and point them to my work, which is all I really wanted

So, in short, no harm no foul.

Very well, then, as long as you're okay with it. It's not my thread, and therefore not my place to tell other people what to do. I simply felt it impolite to use another person's thread to (quite obviously) promote oneself. If the topic's author has no problem with it, however, then it's fine, and I'm sorry I tried to speak in your place.

Aww, Kyunji, I saw your name as the responding poster and was really looking forward to some scathing yet helpful comments. You dissapointed me (Seriously)

Sorry to let you down... I wasn't aware that anyone here looked forward to my "helpful" comments. =P I've been a bit busy lately, so I haven't had a lot of time to comment on new stories. I'll be sure to take a look at your recent works sometime and write a review.

PS - I really would value some input from you Kyunji, and also, you should do some more writing, the (one? Ive been away for a while) story you did write was quite enjoyable.

Thanks for the good words, although after a year and a half of reflection I've come to the conclusion that the story in question was, put bluntly, a pile of crap. I hope to write something better soon, but I haven't managed it yet.

Once again, I'm sorry to have intruded on your topic like this, and hope to make it up to you in the future with my input. Comments are something I feel all authors owe each other.

[Queen Octavia]

Kyunji, I think calling your previous story crap is quite a large exaggeration, and as someone who complains about the scarcity of updates and content on these boards perhaps you should set your personal bar a little lower. A story needn't be perfect for it to be enjoyed. Far from it.

In any event, I look forward to hearing your review, although there is certainly no rush. However in the meantime...

Get out of my topic! *Chases you away with a stick* Bad derailer, bad!

(Totally joking )


PS - Let's put on black ski masks and break into one of Nikkou's threads and write graffiti all over the place...it will be the perfect crime...

[Mitera Nikkou]

Kyunji:

Who do you think I hope for whenever I find the wherewithal to write a story? Comments are nice, but I'm also hoping for some feedback on my grammar, so I can improve or be aware that I got something right.

I agree about what you said regarding DSC's post, but, personally, I'm of the same mind as UberLurker. It doesn't hurt me anyway, although I would discourage it from being done at every opportunity. I kind of figure that that's what a signature is good for.

UberLurker:

Perfect, if only it weren't completely flawed: who's going to see the graffiti inside threads that I do not wear?

And that, my friend, is the miracle of language that I bestow upon you. Treasure it always.

[Queen Octavia]

*Prints out several pages of random MSF threads, duct tapes them together and wears them as jeans around town*

You know you're jealous! Threads are all the rage these days.

*Is walking down main street*

GASP! Oh snap...one of the very important threads just got deleted! *Covers the exposed indecency and scurries away*

Mayhap 'twas not such a great idea...

[Mitera Nikkou]

I hope you didn't miss my wordplay, seeing as you responded to it so literally. XD

I'll get to poking around the rest of your story later. For now I must take advantage of the TV while it's free. (So I can play a video game! Woo!)

[Queen Octavia]

Wordplay? What does that mean? Are you making pun of me?

Oooo - what video game? My most recent vice is Super Smash Brothers Brawl. What I really want is Guitar Hero 3, but I only own a Wii, and finding it for that is impossible.

[Mitera Nikkou]

Silly. I merely used "threads" to mean "clothes" instead of what you meant it to mean. You can't see the graffiti inside of clothes being worn. However, since I'm nekkid, the clothes wouldn't be anywhere that could be seen, anyway. ;p

Oh, I'm just playing Fire Emblem: Radiant Dawn. I probably won't have any money for a new Wii game until May, though by then some games of interest will be out.

[Queen Octavia]

Wee for another chapter being done.

I love telling a story inside a story, because then if the story sucks its not the author (me) 's fault, but rather the character who was narrating it!

*Nods sagely in agreement with myself*

Anyways, this chapter is the most important and was where my idea for the story began, so I hope you like it.

That said, I was writing it in a boring night class with the laptop screen pushed down real low so the people behind me wouldnt be able to see what I was doing. Side effect : I couldn't see either! Probably more typos and stuff than usual, which I'll pick up when I do another revision of the story so far in a day or two.

None of that should diminish the tale though, so you had better like it!

EDIT - Double wee for another chapter fini, teehee!

[Ell]

*sighs* To be perfectly prickish for a moment, you raised my hopes with two expertly constructed chapters, interesting characters, and a wonderful sense of mystery... and then coldly dashed them upon the often poorly written rocks of fanfiction. But, despite my irrational prejudice against its kin, I'm actually enjoying this little romp through Hyrule. Er, I'd offer some in-depth critique of it, but I lack the patience or general willingness to play editor... I will say that you could generally use more commas throughout. You've got a bit of a tendency to rush through sentences without pause, and my eyes are a tad winded from trying to keep up.

[Queen Octavia]

*sighs* To be perfectly prickish for a moment, you raised my hopes with two expertly constructed chapters, interesting characters, and a wonderful sense of mystery... and then coldly dashed them upon the often poorly written rocks of fanfiction. But, despite my irrational prejudice against its kin, I'm actually enjoying this little romp through Hyrule. Er, I'd offer some in-depth critique of it, but I lack the patience or general willingness to play editor... I will say that you could generally use more commas throughout. You've got a bit of a tendency to rush through sentences without pause, and my eyes are a tad winded from trying to keep up.

I too have many prejudices against fanfiction. If I were reading my own story, I would likely have stopped after the third chapter x_X. One of my goals in writing this is that someone who knows nothing about Zelda would be totally unaware that this is fanfiction, and would never lose a beat. The folly of fanfiction is that it tends to assume you know more about the setting than the original did, IE in a series of fantasy novels book #2 will always reintroduce all the characters rather than just rely on the reader remembering all that. It's a hard trap to avoid, since these details are not what I really want to be writing about skipping them can be all too easy, but I'm doing my best.

As for commas...I intentionally try not to use too many of them . My biggest problem with writing used to be that I'd have sentences that just went on forever, averaging 4-5 commas each. So now I try to contain the madness, but perhaps sometimes am I keeping my lengthy phrases and instead of making them more manageable only taking the commas out. I'll read some of the story aloud and see whether or not I suffocate .

Well, thank you very much for your timely input, I decided last night that today I would give the story so far an edit.

EDIT - Edit complete, fixed my random silly errors. There were more of them than I would have thought.

[AshK]

Nice update Uberlurker! Keep up the great work!

Sincerely,
Dark Scout Cyclondia/Erin the Espeon/Ashley Elaine Tyler/ Minako Aino/Venus

[Queen Octavia]

Yarr, another small update. More'll come at some point this evening, most likely 2 more small chapters, whenever I get around to writing 'em. I know what'll happen for the next little while, and then the end, but theres something of a gap inbetween. I'll spend some time thinkin' bout it.

Oh yea, and chapter 12 I didn't intend for Gary to go uber-psyco, I just got rather carried away, lol. The inner villain in me kinda seeped out, I had intended to release him more slowly, zoh well. If you thought I went too far too fast, tell me. I'll be giving Gary some soliloquy time to do some soul searching and justify his out of charactery ness soon, hope y'all continue to like the story thus far.

[Lanzerus]

OMG you are an awesome writer, i hope that you continue to write this awesome story, it took me almost to the 4 chapter till they actually mentioned Zelda/Link/Ganondorf. that it took me to figure out it was a zelda fanfiction.

other than that it is pwnage. i really can't wait to see more, i have fallen in love of your storywriting.