Yugi83's attempts at captions

[yugi83]

None of this art is mine, it is pics that I found on Google Images so if any need to be removed let me know. And without further adeu, I give you: the "Note to Self"s.

http://s980.photobucket.com/albums/ae28 ... aption.png

[Blaze]

Well yugi, I hope you don't mind some criticism.

Your first one is good. It leaves no doubt in the reader's mind what happened. But your second one... simply put, had you not posted it in a TG Captions forum, the reader has no way of knowing that the maid in it was once a man. Smiling to the customers and asking how much sugar they like in their tea is basic hospitality. Unless the sugar turns you into a girl if you have two lumps, that caption could be a pinup in the employee bathroom in any cafe in the world.

[yugi83]

Well yugi, I hope you don't mind some criticism.

Your first one is good. It leaves no doubt in the reader's mind what happened. But your second one... simply put, had you not posted it in a TG Captions forum, the reader has no way of knowing that the maid in it was once a man. Smiling to the customers and asking how much sugar they like in their tea is basic hospitality. Unless the sugar turns you into a girl if you have two lumps, that caption could be a pinup in the employee bathroom in any cafe in the world.

Thanks Blazerkin, I'm going to redo this one now.

[Kumi-chan]

Really both aren't very clear on the TG. And the second one had major cut off problems.

[Queen Octavia]

#1 was definitely better than #2.

Both were a bit vague... but you get +11 bonus points for using a Code Geass picture!

<3 Geass

[yugi83]

#1 was definitely better than #2.

Both were a bit vague... but you get +11 bonus points for using a Code Geass picture!

<3 Geass

Any tips on how to make them better?

[Queen Octavia]

Any tips on how to make them better?

While short captions can be quick and fun, longer ones are usually better.

Using some descriptive words (But not necessarily too many) about the new form seen in the image is sometimes good.

Jokes are fun, and puns are even more funs.

Those're just my opinions though, I'm hardly an authority on the matter, as I seldom do captions (Past few days aside).

[yugi83]

[dr5]

the captions are cut off I cannot read them all

[Mitera Nikkou]

Yeah; that's the stupid prosilver style for you. In the end, it's better to simply link to the captions.

As for the captions: eh... so-so. The literary portion is good (which is always nice), but I'm not really engaged by the content. That might just be me, though.

[Queen Octavia]

I reserve judgement for when I can read the last bit. I just stopped when I noticed the cut off.

[Sasha]

right click on em and choose view pic you'll see it all.

[muffinstud]

Regarding the cutoffs, that's where the links come in handy. Just link to the image file, and people can see it as big as you intended it to be.
That, and it's friendlier to the poor saps who are getting beaten by the AOL dialup stick.

First, the bad. For the most part, it all has the same kind of tone to it that most beginning captioneers have (myself included). Meaning, they feel a little disjointed. The Morgan LeFey one is a prime example of this, as it just seems to jump from one thought to the next without any real segways.

Second, the good. GRAMMAR! HONEST TO GOODNESS EFFORT WITH GRAMMAR! Thank you for knowing how to use the English language well enough to be understood. Also, with a little better delivery, the ribbon dancer caption could be quite fun. It's different enough that it could, with a few tweaks, be a good caption.

If you feel discouraged, take a look at some of the different folks' earlier captions. I know I, personally, had some bad habits with my earlier stuff. But keep at it and keep practicing and you'll find yourself doing better.

[yugi83]

Regarding the cutoffs, that's where the links come in handy. Just link to the image file, and people can see it as big as you intended it to be.
That, and it's friendlier to the poor saps who are getting beaten by the AOL dialup stick.

First, the bad. For the most part, it all has the same kind of tone to it that most beginning captioneers have (myself included). Meaning, they feel a little disjointed. The Morgan LeFey one is a prime example of this, as it just seems to jump from one thought to the next without any real segways.

Second, the good. GRAMMAR! HONEST TO GOODNESS EFFORT WITH GRAMMAR! Thank you for knowing how to use the English language well enough to be understood. Also, with a little better delivery, the ribbon dancer caption could be quite fun. It's different enough that it could, with a few tweaks, be a good caption.

If you feel discouraged, take a look at some of the different folks' earlier captions. I know I, personally, had some bad habits with my earlier stuff. But keep at it and keep practicing and you'll find yourself doing better.

Thanks for the critique. Perhaps I can run any future captions by you for critque first?